The Lilies of the Field
(Nick enters the room wearing a trench coat, Sherlock hat, and glasses and fake mustache. He's whispering loudly to the kids.)
Nick: Remember, you didn't see me. It's like I'm not even here. Pretend I'm someone you don't want to know.
Nathaniel: (Walks up behind Nick and taps him on the shoulder.) Hi, Nick.
Nick: (Screams and jumps away because he's so startled.) AUUUUGGGHH! Don't DO that to me!
Nathaniel: You mean, don't say, "hi?"
Nick: No, I mean don't sneak up on me that way.
Nathaniel: I wasn't sneaking. You're usually not so touchy.
Nick: Yeah, well usually I'm not hiding out from a sister who is going to get me. How did you know who I was?
Nathaniel: Sherlock Holmes wasn't a thirteen-year-old kid.
Nick: Good point. (While he is facing Nathaniel, Erik comes up behind him.)
Erik: Hi, Nick.
Nick: (Again so startled he screams and jumps) AUUUUUGGGHHH!
Erik: What's the matter with you?
Nick: Don't DO that! I'm hiding out from my sister.
Erik: What did you do this time?
Nick: I found this awful shocking pink paint in the garage. While Susanna was visiting our grandma, I repainted her room. I'm going under cover so she can’t find me. (Starts laughing) She's supposed to be back any minute. I'm pretty sure we'll hear the explosion from here. (Laughs)
Nathaniel: I can't believe you did that.
Erik: She's going to cream you.
Susan: (Coming up behind Nick) Cream who?
Nick: AUUUUUGHHH! (Jumping halfway across the room again and clutching his heart.) I don't think I can take much more of this.
Susan: Are you going to a costume party?
Nick: (Big sigh) NO! This is my disguise.
Susan: (Aside to the kids while pointing at Nick) Weirdo. (Back to Nick) And you look so nice. By the way, you should be getting home. Your Mom is planning a welcome back party for Susanna. You should see how she re-decorated her room. It's shocking pink with awesome white and green accents. Susanna is going to be thrilled because she picked out the paint herself before they went away. It was in the garage. (Checks watch) Ooh. I better get going. Bye!
Nathaniel: I'd say someone up there was looking for Susanna. What do you think, Nick?
Erik: (Sarcastic) Someone BIG? Like GOD? Ya think?
Nick: (Hitting his head with his hand or any convenient hard object) It's that lilies of the field and birds of the air thing. They don't do any work, but God's taking care of them. Susanna leaves town, and God's got her back. I should have known my evil plan would backfire. I guess we might as well go to the party.
(As they leave.)
Erik: (To Nathaniel as they exit.) Oooh. Do you think they’ll have cake? I love cake.
Nick: (Following grimly behind.) Traitor.